It's never too late to dream big but how do we nourish and protect a child's dreams when they arrive?
As someone who recently dusted off her guitar after more than a decade, I find late bloomers inspiring. Susan Boyle and Andrea Bocelli pursued music later in life. Harlan Sanders founded Kentucky Fried Chicken at age 65. Oprah Winfrey, Stephen Hawking, Helen Keller and Christopher Reeve forged ahead despite obstacles ranging from racism, early adversity, neurological disease, paraplegia, deaf and blindness.
Some people followed their childhood dreams like it was the north star. My husband bought an apartment building right after high school, because he knew he wanted to be his own boss. Lady Gaga, Jennifer Hudson and the late Sidney Poitier knew from an early age they would become movie or music stars. I realize following our dreams doesn't mean we all become movie or music stars, but we all can expand our horizons to feel more fulfilled, creative and alive.
If we want the children we love to follow their dreams we need to celebrate imagination. Celebrate dreams, daydreams, dress up days and sudden announcements like "today I'm an astronaut." Enter the dream. "Let's go into space together!" Lie down in the grass as the clouds make pictures in the sky. Dress up with them. Say yes to the dream and protect yourself and them from adversity. Take care of you and your life.
If you are familiar with ACE scores or Adverse Childhood Experiences you know that the accumulation of stress early in life can damage or delay a child's dreams. It can interfere with how we parent. When a child is focused on the anxieties of life they are not dreaming of a good future. When a parent is focused on the anxieties of life they have trouble enjoying the moment. Stress means both the adults and child are trying to navigate emotions, relationships, conflicts and goals with more doubt than confidence, and more distraction than focus.
A child's big dreams rely on you for success. If you are struggling, seek out the support you need so you can be a dream protector. And, as you follow your north star toward your healing, dreaming and living try some of these things with a child:
Allow temporary messes. Let chocolate pudding become finger paint and sheets in the laundry basket become a fort.
Take 5 for the 5 senses. Close your eyes and listen to the wind. Clear everything off the table and see how slowly you can eat an orange together. Pet the dog toether and wonder out loud about whether the dog's fur is soft like a blanket or puffy like a cloud. Cook rainbow pasta and notice the smells and colors. Try one thing for each of the senses.
Move together. Take turns meowing and stretching like a cat or pretending to reach the stars in the sky. Race around the house. If the weather is bad race around the table.
Eat together and notice colors and smells.
Play ! make believe--fireman, doctor, teacher and more!
For more information on ACE's go to https://www.cdc.gov/aces/about/index.html.
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